[GIFTED] Anderson's Woven Belt

If you're lithe enough to wear your shirt tucked in, you're open to a world full of fun accessories. Namely, belts.

Damn you, healthy, disciplined people, you get all the fantastic fashion accoutrements.

If you're one of those people, I suggest you pick up Anderson's Woven Belt ($100, Mr. Porter).

It's bright, it's colorful, and it says, "I'm skinny enough to wear one of these comfortably."

[GIFTED] Biella Patent Loafers

Since you're too old to wear sneakers anywhere but the gym, and you don't want to wear heels anymore after a couple of weeks of 12 hour days at the office, you've resigned yourself to wearing flats every day.  

Those worn-out flats from Payless aren't doing you any favors, so how about trying these Biella Patent Loafers ($228, J. Crew) on for size?  Sure, they're ridiculously expensive, but they're made to last and offer a pop of color in an otherwise gray officespace.  

[GIFTED] Charlie Coal Bag

Thanks to Global Warming, it feels like the middle of July even though it's barely April.  As someone who wears so many bright colors she could be in a Gap commercial if she lost 30 pounds, I couldn't be happier about this.  It's time to wear boat shoes and carry around tote bags!

This Charlie Coal Bag ($245, Jack Spade) is my favorite new tote bag out there—if only I could afford it.  Who wants to go halfsies?

[GIFTED] Atlantic Pearl Divers Sheet Set

So, you've finally convinced someone to come home with you.  And not in the "Come home with me and I'll make you a grilled cheese because you're so drunk and I'm concerned you'll fall to your death on the subway tracks" sense, but rather in a "Dim the lights, cue the Damien Rice playlist" sense.  

Instead of shamefully keeping the lights off to hide your body and your devastating home decor choices, dazzle your new love interest with these Atlantic Pearl Divers Sheets (Starts at $150, Vice Merchants). 

Start singing some songs from The Little Mermaid and if they don't run away screaming, underwear-in hand, congratulations—you've found someone crazy enough to deal with you.  Remind them of that creepy line, "Darling it's better down where it's wetter" and you're in for some weird times.    

[GIFTED] All Aboard Ship Clutch

Ahoy mateys!  While I'm obsessed with the nautical life (or, a pirate's life, if you will), it's not en vogue anymore since that whole Italian cruise ship disaster.  You just want to go for a nice cruise, with your boat shoes and your striped shirts, and then all of a sudden you're reenacting the most upsetting scenes from Titanic.   

But listen, forget about all of that: you'll look great on deck with the Kate Spade All Aboard Ship Clutch ($358, Zappos).  If a crisis situation happens, though, don't tell anyone you fell off the ship and into a life boat.  No one will believe that for a second.